on making new friends (we don't have enough time)
๐ค
adronitis : frustration with how long it takes to get to know someone
As I meet more and more people, naturally I want to become friends with them. I have met some great people over my life but a friendship has been left unformed by simply running out of time. Don't you ever get that feeling that you and someone else would be great friends if only you could have a proper talk, or hang out more? Sometimes circumstances don't allow for more time spent together, and a friendship becomes a what could have been.
Studies show that it takes about 40-60 hours to become friends with someone. This is why it's so easy to make friends at work, school, or uni- you are forced to spend time with people, enough time to become friends. Outside of those places however, making friends is difficult because it is difficult to find 40 hours of time just hanging out with someone.
This does make sense thinking about it. Most adults in my life don't have as many friends compared to, say, a high schooler. Not that this is always a bad thing- sometimes it is better to have a few rich meaningful friendships than many shallow ones.
The moral of the story? Making friends, especially as you get older, is hard. But that doesn't mean it isn't worth making new friends. This might mean pushing for those extra hours spent together, for a friendship to last longer.
xoxo cec